I'm just a girl . . .

Played in a poker tournament last night at the house of this guy we know who hosts these things periodically. It was quite a scene. There were 20 players, and we were set up at two tables of ten each. I was one of only three women, and the other two were about 60 and 80 years old, respectively. I know a lot more women are playing poker these days, blah blah blah, but we were obviously underrepresented at this particular event. The guys ranged in ages from about 18 to 80, and the whole thing had a definite rednecky flavor, so you can imagine the scene. So I'm sitting at the table with my chips in front of me, I'm in the big blind, and the first hand is dealt. The action comes around to me, and I'm looking at my cards and making my decision, and the guy sitting across from me, who is probably in his late 40s or so, looks at me and says, "You can either raise--that means to put more money in--or you can check, where you don't have to put more money in because you already have a bet in the pot."

Yes folks, apparently there are men in the world who are just always going to assume women don't know how to play, no matter what. I guess he just thought I put up my $20 buy-in and sat down at the table with all these big old manly gunslingers, totally clueless. I just sighed, and suddenly felt the weight of all sexist assumptions resting on my shoulders, as melodramatic as that sounds. There are many ways I could have responded--playing up the "dumb girl" act, for example, or cutting him down with a bitingly sarcastic remark, of which I am very capable. But I just felt tired and disgusted with the whole issue, frankly. So I just stared at him for a moment and then said, "I know how to play." And I played out the hand.

But of course, me being who I am, that's not the end of the story. I was sitting there, thinking about what he'd said, and it was just irking me more and more, and I knew it was going to throw me off my game thinking about it, and so as the next hand was being dealt, I casually said, "You know, I think it's kind of funny that some men just assume women don't know how to play this game." That flustered the guy, and got the guys at end of the table all apologizing for men in general, and then they all started talking about various women they'd played at various events who had kicked their ass. I felt much better. I wound up coming in sixth--no money, no glory--but I outlasted my "coach," which made it all worth it.